Two Very Special Barmitzvahs and Two Very Special Families

I know, it is already the end of February and I am writing about events over two months ago. There were so many people visiting in December and they all kept us so busy that I wasn't able to write in the blog very much. I have also been adjusting to our new scheduale at the same time that the bus routes in Jerusalem changed.........I have been doing a little more driving than usual as Yonatan no longer has one bus to take him straight to school. So I feel that I have to backtrack because a lot went on that was really fun and special, including these two barmitzvahs.





First one was Nadav Kandler and it took place in Rehovot. We were very excited to be a part of this simcha! As most of you know, the Kandlers are very dear friends from Israel who for some reason like to go on shlichut in Toronto. We are grateful that they did the first round and we were priviledged to meet them and become such good friends. Nadav has always been a "character" who is full of zest and good fun. He loves to sing and joke and is quite good company! At the same time he is always ready to give a dvar torah and discuss more serious issues. The barmitzvah was taking place at the shul of Natan's parents and we were all invited. Friday afternoon we headed out to Rechovot. We stayed at friends of the Kandlers(sr.) and were greeted warmly and settled in. Friday night we all gathered at the shul where we were "reunited" with the Kandlers. It was a beautiful davening led by none other than Nadav. Friday night dinner as all meals was served in the shul. The tables were set beautifully with coordinating table clothes, and plastic dishes, each napkin had a little homemade napkin holder made by Orit and shlepped from Canada. Actually every meal had a napkin du-hicky made and shlepped by Orit. The food...all homemade and absolutely delicious...their families had divided up the meals and everyone made , brought and yes served. It was a scene to behold, not one "waiter", yet everything went smoothly from one moment to the next, there was no panic and everyone was happy and content. We slowly began to meet different family members and to feel a part of the group. Needless to say they are not a shabby bunch! Everyone was warm and welcoming , just as you would expect from Natan's and Orit's families. Each meal of the weekend, and there were alot, was set up and taken down by everyone and each one had different beautiful tablecloths etc. Why am I telling you all these little details.......because it was so opposite to the barmitzvahs we were use to in Canada and it really struck us.........this was less fancy, and had none of the 'help' serving etc that other barmitzvahs did but it was no less beautiful or special in fact it was even more special. We are finding that the events here don't have all the 'stuff' that goes with a simcha in Chutz l'aretz but generally speaking without all the 'stuff' you can feel the actual event more directly. It is like dressing something up so much that you do not recognize it and without all the glitz you can clearly see what it is.

The other feeling we experienced at this barmitzvah was the specialness of the families and the absolute love of torah and eretz yisrael. It was especially interesting for us as olim to look at the kandler family all these years after making aliyah from England, and to see how their children (natan included) and their grandchildren (ken yirbu) are thriving and how they are so a part of this country in everyway. Friday night after the meal the community was invited to join the Kandlers at shul for an oneg shabbat. People began floating in and dessert magically appeared and singing kept happening. Then brother after brother told stories and divrei torah, it was phenomenal. What is even more amazing is that they probably don't think it was all "so amazing and special" in the same way we do because for them this is just the way they do things always.

Well I cannot end without mentioning the very special star of the day, Nadav. His laining and davening were executed beautifully, with his strong confidant voice and his divrei torah were beautiful and thoughtful. I must make a special note of his solo performance sung to his Ima on the occasion of her birthday (she turned 28).
We packed up and said our goodbyes after shabbat feeling very uplifted and blessed. What was nice about this goodbye was that we know they will be back here soon and we will be able to spend many more special shabbatot and celebrate many more simchas together!




Only a couple of days later we awoke early and hopped into the car and headed in to Yerushalayim to celebrate the barmitzvah of Noam Steinman together with his very special family at the kotel. As you may or may not know I go back with both Noam's parents...Golda and I were roommates in university in Toronto, and Ned and I went to Camp Kadimah many many years ago (not that many, we are both very young!). Last year the Steinman-Feig clan came to Israel for a family trip whereupon young lad Noam declared that he did not want one of those big barmitzvahs and would like it very much if his parents would take the money and they could celebrate his barmitzvah in Israel. So here they were although much had occured in the interim. Golda's dear father Moshe Z"l had since passed away an event which was difficult for not only Golda but also for her children. His deep connection and history with Israel did not leave a small effect on Golda and her family. Noam lained beautifully surrounded by family and friends. Especially noteworthy was the presence of his Bubbie Lillian and her sister and nephew who all made the effort to travel and be with Noam and his parents on this very momentous occasion. He wore his grandfather's tallit and near him were his grandfathers cousins (the few that were spared Hitler's wrath) and old army friends who had fought side by side with his zaydie. It was a moving event and Golda's fathers presence was very much missed but also very much felt at the same time.

After davening and laining, we all headed over to Between the Arches for a beautiful breakfast celebration. There was a wonderful warm feeling of celebration and simcha. The restaurant is in a ancient water cistern and gives you the sense of the depth of our ancient history here.


Over the past few years our children have become quite friendly and really enjoy spending time together. So it was nice to see them hanging with the Steinmans, Yonatan especially looks up to Noam and I don't mean just physically. It was also special to get to spend time with our other good old friends Mike and Faye Landau-Goldman and their kids who had just arrived the night before and were in a jet-lag daze. You know your really great friends when you can go a long time without seeing them and just pick up where you left off when you see them again, those are what you call life long friends!

We were brought back in our memories to the day after our aliyah when we were in the same restaurant to celebrate with Zev Lewis, it was only 5 months earlier but somehow we felt a little different somewhat changed since that time. It is amazing how spending even short periods of time in Israel can really change you.




Sof , sof it was a beautiful event and a special memory for all. When Noam had his first aliyah in Ottawa I sent an email to him. In it I described how we felt he was a very special person,who at his young age made such a mature and difficult decision to forego his celebration in Ottawa for something less glitzy but so deep and meaningful. If I know you this is only the beginning of your relationship with Israel and that we will have opportunities to celebrate many more simchas together. Noam, we are so pleased you did make it to Israel and that we were able to a part of your simcha.