Noises in the Night

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night and hear strange, whiney voices in the distance? Do you sit up in bed and ask "what is that loud, whiney song outside my window?" It is usually then that I shake my head and pinch my arm and realize that we are not in "Kansas" anymore!! I actually like the sound of the Arabs calling to prayer..I just wish it wasn't in the middle of the night and another four times in the day. Somehow it has a middle eastern sound that reminds me of where we are and the uniqueness of this place we call home. Sometimes when we are walking on a Friday night in the yishuv, out of the darkness suddenly jumps these calls to prayer or music from their simchas. They play some kind of flute or wind instrument that has a unique arab sound to it. Sometimes we can even see fireworks ...supposedly this is customary at weddings.

Now you should know, that everyone in israel lives close to Arabs in some way, even those that don't want to think about it or acknowledge this fact. In Jerusalem, Jewish neighborhoods are directly next to Arab neighborhoods as in many other cities as well. Yesterday we met with a Tehilla Pilot Trip group (the same trip we were on last year at this time), Darrell and I were asked to address the group about our experiences and feelings about living in the Gush. One of the group asked me if I felt like I was living in a "military fortress"...i was astounded and afterwards I was astounded that I was astounded. First of all fyi, my answer was that I absolutely do not feel the military fortress feeling, in any way, when driving out to the gush. Yes I have to go through a machsom (checkpoint) and yes I do see Arabs along the road on foot , donkey or in cars/taxis etc. but that I know rationally that it is no different anywhere else atleast I am aware of what's around me and know what I am dealing with. I think it is a very comfortable illusion to think the security situation is any different to someone walking the streets of Jerusalem. In fact during the height of the intifada, there were more deaths and injuries in the cities of Jerusalem, Netanya, and Haifa than there were out here on our roads.

So why was I astounded that I was astounded about the military fortress question....I remember when we came two years ago for the summer with the family, I was nervous about security and I had rules about where we could go and where we shouldn't, how we should get there and how not etc. and as the summer progressed i readjusted my perspective and while I still held by some rules I let up on others. I came to the realization that "safety" and my control over it was really an illusion I created to make myself feel better. Really it is all out of my hands and under Gds. watchful eye and I would be better to pray to him than make a list of rules for all my family to obey. This said you still have to be responsible and not take crazy risks.

Darrell gave a good analogy to the group...when you come to Israel the first time you see soldiers all over, and you notice every gun and every chayal and after a short time it becomes part of the picture , just everyday life. In that summer we were here we drove out to visit friends in Efrat and I remember feeling nervous and uncomfortable on the first drive out but then as we came out more often it didn't bother me and now I drive that road back and forth on a regular basis and when I go through the machsom or see the soldiers I thank gd. that they are here to protect us and he should protect them. And I do feel protected by them, actually moreso out here than in the city! It is interesting, Darrell came to visit on his own for a family wedding and Natan Kandler took him for a drive around the Shomron in his car. Darrell describes speeding along highways in areas he wasn't so sure about...Natan stated he takes this road but makes sure todrive quickly. Then he points to another highway and says this one I don't drive on...it struck Darrell how everyone has their own comfort zone and you get use to different levels or you create your own relative illusion that works for you. The idea of a safe world or safer places in the world exploded for me with the Twin Towers on 9/11 and it was then that I realized I had grown up in a bubble and the last half a century since the shoah was an 'out of the ordinary' period in Jewish History rather than what was the norm or what would continue on.

It is interesting how the sounds of Arab prayer evoke many different kinds of feelings for all of us. Some of the women on the yishuv, talk about a time when they use to shop in Bethlehem and when it wasn't a problem to go into the neighborhood Kfars to buy different items. They sigh as if remembering the good old days and longing for them once again. Some feel anger, other sadness and others longing for a different situation....or all of the above depending on the day. And sometimes I just feel that they really should just adjust the volume on their speakers, that if I am hearing it so loud in my bedroom what about their own villagers, they will be a cranky bunch come the morning if someone doesn't TURN DOWN THE VOLUME!!!!!